BITCH
| <<-- : 01.23.03 : -->> |
11:59 a.m.have you ever been so angry that your face would get really warm?
i have. just now.
i haven't been this angry before in a really long time. i use to get this way a lot before. especially at work when i use to work at starbucks and in long beach. i remember i use to let things get to me. little things. stupid people. stupid co-workers. i'd get all flustered and warm.
i didn't like the way it made me feel.
helpless.
vindictive.
i felt like i was capable of hurting someone.
i decided that i wasn't going to get like that anymore. especially at work. that whatever would make me angry, i would just let it go. i would just decide that it no longer mattered. anything that would happen, no matter how great, i would deal. and i would be fine. so there was no need to be angry. those emotions didn't belong in the workplace.
well there's this girl here and let's call her BITCH. fitting name. when i started working here, i'd "accidentally" take long lunches with carina. i know, my bad. i've done it a couple times, thinking that it was okay. BITCH complained. so afterwards, i've been put on watch. i'd take a couple extra cigarette breaks. BITCH complained. these two girls at work are friends, and they take breaks together sometimes. BITCH complained. so now our department has schedules of when we can take our lunches. since i work at the front desk and everytime i go on a break, someone has to relieve me. so i would call like these three people to break me. no particular order. i would just not call BITCH to break me because, well, because she's a bitch. why should i ask any favors from her? well... BITCH complained. so now i had to make a schedule of who's to break me so it's all equal and fair. fine. not a problem. it makes it easier for me.
i guess BITCH and this other lady are major suck-ups to our supervisor. and any chance they get to complain...they complain. i guess they've been talking about me. because lately, i've been really lax about using the schedule. mostly it has to do with how busy it has been. and sometimes it's more convenient to call someone else to cover. but, my friend overheard the two of them saying that they intend to purposely not break me on time. fine, cuz i don't really take my breaks on the time given. i can wait, whatever. it's not a big deal, as long as i get my break. well lately, BITCH hasn't been answering the calls i transfer. and the people would come back to me and blame me for transferring them to a voicemail, when in reality, BITCH should have picked up the damn phone. so sometimes when i call for her to break me, she wouldn't answer. fine. not a problem. i'd just call again. no answer. fine. not a problem. i could just overhead page her. no answer. fine. not a problem. so i'd go around my desk and peek out to see if she's there. yup. there. BITCH BITCHY BITCH BITCH. today, no answer.
i'm sick of these stupid games that these ladies have to play. it's really unnecessary. i think it has a lot to do with the fact that the rest of us here have made actual friends, people we can count on AND have fun with to make our work day less boring.
okay i'm going to go take lunch. maybe i'll "accidentally" take a longer lunch today.
my head hurts. i need to clear my head.
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