spontaneous bar hopping
| <<-- : 12.03.03 : -->> |
4:47 p.m.last night i became extremely restless here in my apartment. it was my first night staying here. but i couldn't do anything. so i put on some clothes, got pretty, and i took two buses to the castro.
i stopped by "the bar on castro" and had a drink. then another one. then another one. i stepped out and met two guys who seemed to be having fun. they were george and kevin. george was cute, but he knew it and all the guys kept hitting on him. kevin wasn't as cute, but he was a lot of fun. they took me to this bar called the badlands and we danced to bad pop.
at "the bar" i met a really cute bartender, named shaun. he was really nice to me and we talked. but he's seeing someone. i gave him my number anyway. i could use more friends, ya know? but yeah. i made a fool of myself for him, but he thought it was cute.
i love walking down the street and guys telling me i'm cute. it was such an ego booster. i couldn't believe how bad of a self image i present myself. i'm young and i'm cute. i'm not the most goodlooking in all of san fran, but i'm at least cute enough to have strangers talk to me. or i can walk up to strangers and talk to them. i won't be completely shunned. only by the stuck-up and too-cute-for-their-own-good kind. i think my experiences in west hollywood has prepared me for those interactions. i know where i stand and who i can approach.
this city is going to be so much. maybe too fun. but it's good to know that i can go out alone if i wanted to. i like having that ability. i like it when people ask me if i'm there alone, and when i say yes, their responses are like, "whoa, you? you alone? how can that be?" it's such an ego booster.
i should never fear being alone. i shouldn't fear anything. but the most part, not being alone. i'm a good person. i know that. i will attract good people. i am where i'm suppose to be. and i'm going where i'm suppose to go. things will look up.
i just need to get a job soon. and i need to get over this cold.
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